Key Takeaways (TL:DR)
- Celebrate love on February 14 with thoughtful, low-cost ideas based on love languages.
- Identify your partner’s love language: Words of affirmation, Quality time, Receiving gifts, Acts of service, or Physical touch.
- Suggest meaningful activities like writing a letter, cooking together, or giving a massage to express your love.
- Create personalized gifts or experiences that reflect your partner’s interests, enhancing your bond.
- Engage in acts of service or quality time to strengthen your relationship and make Valentine’s Day special.
February 14 (Valentine’s Day!) is just around the corner. If you’re a planner, you probably already have some ideas about how you want to celebrate your love. For everyone else, I’ve put together some ideas that don’t cost much/if anything, grouped by Love Language categories from The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman (you’re welcome).
But first, do you know your partner’s love language? No? Here’s a quick rundown:
- Words of affirmation (appreciation)
- Quality time
- Receiving gifts
- Acts of service
- Physical touch
So here we go…
Words of affirmation:
- Write a letter to your love, telling him/her some specific things you appreciate about them.
- Try your hand at writing a poem dedicated to your love. Or, copy a classic love poem (thank you google) in your own handwriting. Or print on nice paper and place in a simple frame.
- Purchase an inexpensive notebook to use as a “gratitude journal” for your marriage. Make the first entry.
- Write a love note on the bathroom or bedroom mirror with lipstick
- Leave sticky notes in places that will surprise them on Valentine’s Day
BONUS: mail something to your sweetie, postmarked in LOVELAND, CO. Yes, it’s a thing! In order to get the special message, Valentine’s or letters should be pre-stamped and pre-addressed and sent together in a larger 1st Class envelope to:
Postmaster – Attention Valentines, 446 E. 29th St., Loveland, CO 80538-9998.
(Better get cracking on this one if you want it before Valentine’s Day!)
Quality Time:
- What is something your love enjoys but isn’t necessarily your favorite thing? Give him/her an outing together to do that thing.
- Put together a picnic (indoors, by a fireplace, if it’s snowy where you live!). Visit a local cheese or gourmet shop to gather some new cheeseboard combinations, a bottle of bubbly, or special sweet treat.
- Have trouble prying the phone out of your hand? Give your spouse an entire evening with the phone turned off or out of sight, with the intention of giving them your full attention for the entire evening.
- Do something together outside—ice skate, take a walk, ride bikes, ski. Plan a special meal afterward.
- Cook a new dish together
- Look through photos of you as a couple and reminisce about the good memories you share.
Receiving gifts:
- This doesn’t have to be expensive, but it does require listening for clues to pick up something they mention in passing. What is their hobby? Cooking, gardening, photography, trail running, gaming, woodworking…google some ideas for their hobby if you don’t hear them mention something. Sometimes, a little sleuthing on their Amazon wish list may give you an idea!
- Unless someone just has their heart set on a dozen roses (a fortune at Valentine’s Day!), fresh flowers, a house plant, or succulents are always appreciated.
- Create a playlist of songs that capture your relationship, and serve it with their favorite coffee/wine/liquor.
- Sign up to take a class together
Acts of Service:
- What is one chore your partner doesn’t like? Laundry? (Does anyone LIKE doing laundry?) Offer to do it for a week. Or some other chore…take it on as a way of serving them.
- Make their favorite meal for dinner, with candlelight.
- Bring breakfast in bed—great way to start the day!
- Give them a block of time to watch a favorite show uninterrupted (this is mainly for couples with kiddos), or take a walk while you watch the kids.
- Hint: People whose top Love Language is Acts of service are usually people who SHOW their love by serving others and sometimes have trouble giving themselves permission to do for themselves. While this doesn’t sound super romantic, giving them time for whatever they need usually leaves them refreshed and more engaged in the relationship. Win/win :).
Physical touch:
- Beyond the obvious, turn up the romance a notch with candles, a new location (I’ll leave that to your imagination), or love notes left throughout the day to increase anticipation.
- Offer a back rub with aromatherapy oils.
- Offer to give a foot rub.
- Be the first to take their hand, or put your arm around them.
- Go dancing!
I hope this gets your creative juices going. What else would YOU add?
For more ideas on sustaining love, read Love is Not Enough
I’m Kathy Rushing, formerly a Licensed Marriage & Family Counselor for 30+ years, now a Relationship Coach.
Based in Fort Collins, Colorado, I meet with individuals & couples across the U.S. We meet virtually (over Zoom) or in person at my office in Old Town.
